The Reminiscence

she's sitting there. alone, wiping tears that splatters the letter. she crosses her legs, takeing her breath in, deeply. trying to be calm. she's relaxing herself, physically. yet, she's paralyzed inside. indeed. there's nothing she can do. nothing. but she won't give up. that's a promise and a vow made when she and him were on the altar, repeating every single word the priest said. she still remember the moment she walked through the aisle, gripping her father's arm so hard, with both brown beautiful eyes sticked and still on that pair of her loved one's eyes. to be cleared, her husband. the eyes she'll never forget. the eyes she'll always think of. the eyes that mesmerizes her when they first met. and always will.

she reminisces each and every memory of them, being together. he embraced her with her toast warm body. she felt secure and believed there's nothing could harm her as long as he's there. but it was all left as a memory. he's leaving her now. he's leaving her for another happiness that he had recently found. she'd never knew what mistake had she done. her mind blurred by all thoughts. she did nothing, but cry. all day and night. all weeks and months. though it takes another thousand years to mourn, she will cry. she knows the pain is suffocating. she'd rather die than living without him and all because she's still hypnotized by the surprise he planned, the surprise that should carve a smile on her face and not this kind of sickening tears.

she's standing up now, on her own. the curtains are all tied. she looks up for the sun. the sun is bold and shimmering. close enough to hurt her eyes. the sunlight glitters penetrate through the glass of the window pane. the sunlight ray is beautiful and energetic. she breathes again. she knows there'll always be a light for her to walk, and to guide her from another wrong path. even if she has to walk alone, she'll walk. and find her another happiness. but this time is different. cause she'll walk without him. facing off life.

wedding souvenirs

so, i just got back from Ipoh, attending my cousins wedding. they are twins yet ain't look alike. these are some pictures. enjoy :D

this little kid named alia, she hates camera

and this little monster, he's annoying

screw me, bullshit

cam whoring with my forever enemy

the beautiful purplish brides

mama with her some sort of quirky pose

mama and aunts and one of the brides

mama with her sister

no longer there

i'm always here, wanting and waiting for him
i'm always here, hoping and wishing for him to act
i'm always here, crying and dying for his love
i'm always here, looking and seeking for his attention
i'm always here, talking and laughing for the past memories
i'm always here, praying and willing to wait for him
because

this :3

for God's sake, why don't you ask him first, dear girl?

however, if i were that girl, i'll be doing the same

why would you let me go at first place if you still love me?

sayang

sayang apa khabar denganmu?
di sini ku merindukan kamu
ku harap cintamu takkan berubah
kerna disini ku tetap untukmu

sayang apa khabar denganmu?
cubalah kamu telefon diriku
ku rindu dengan suara indahmu
kerna dirimulah semangat hidupku

sayang dengarlah permintaanku
jangan ragukan cintaku
sayang percayalah apa kataku
kerna ku sayang kamu

sayang dengarlah permintaanku
jaga hatimu untukku
sayang dengarlah bisikan hatiku
kerna ku sayang kamu

loves,

syaa shae

fellas

ieda, thank you for hearing some shits from me last night. tak boleh control sorang sorang, you know me so well kan? kau laaagi berpengalaman daripada aku i guess, im bad at making decision. sigh. i miss you ieda. aku rasa nk ambik mp3 kau then dengar lagu lagu then nangis je. then nanti bantal kau basah. hekk.hugs and kisses xx.

hanys, thank you for your encouraging words, somehow, aku rasa bersemangat balik! thats what you guys have been thinking about eh selama ni? hihi. asal tak cakap awal awal? gahhh, okay i'll listen. btw respect gila kat kau cos pergi tuition. mesti kau pandai gila enn. love ya.